Unlovable

Kennedy Center Ceiling

As  21 year old nursing students at Goshen College (http://www.goshen.edu/), my friend Beth and I were accepted at a summer program in Washington DC to work at Children's Hospital National Medical Center as child care technicians (CCT). (The movie version would probably have been called "Country Girls' Adventure in the Big City")
Learning to use public transportation was crucial since we didn't have a car, and learn it, we did. People were mostly friendly and helpful, and being a racial minority was an important growth experience.  Only once did I get on an express bus by mistake which took me way past my designated stop. Oh well, I needed a long walk....

CCT's worked all three shifts, so public transportation during the hours of darkness added stress and challenge especially as we had to change buses in an unsavory neighborhood. One night as Beth and I waited for the second bus to pick us up on a lonely corner across from a bar, a man sauntered into view, shadow boxing, talking to unseen entities, dancing, and moving closer and closer.  Chalk it up to my country girl ignorance, I  was stupidly holding my bus transfer slip in my hand and had my stethoscope draped around my neck. This guy came up and plucked the transfer right out of my hand and reached for my 'scope which I grasped tightly. We made zero attempts to engage him in conversation but passively tried to ignore him while silently praying for the bus to come quickly. (Probably something like, "BUS GET HERE! BUS GET HERE! BUS GET HERE! PLEASE, GOD!)
The bus arrived, but of course, the guy had MY bus pass and got on with us.  The seat immediately behind the driver was open, and we scooted into it like lambs to their mama.  The harassment escalated with verbal remarks and leering. A grimy hand reached out toward Beth's leg, and she hollered "Don't touch me!"
Now the driver got involved, and two men began yelling at each other. Thankfully the hospital came into view, and Beth and I quickly exited the bus with the driver continuing to engage the obnoxious, horrible man.

I called him worse things in my journal of which the last line in my writing reads, "God is certainly marvelous if he can love such scum." 

Recently I was grumbling to Brother Nelson about someone I know who is difficult, controlling, and unpleasant to be around.  His gentle response was something like, "As hard as it is, aren't those the people who usually need the most love?"

God is, indeed, marvelous. When people say, "But for the grace of God, there go I." I now think, "There is the grace of God. For God's love is marvelous and encompassing. Lord, as I accept that love for myself, let me love others as you love." 

In his presermon notes, Brother Mick says,

"The concept of love seems to be a very natural and appropriate one for Mother’s Day. Yet again, I am reminded that the sentimental, familial kind of love that we refer to when thinking of our mothers can be very different from the difficult kind of “loving someone unlovable” love we are called to as God’s people. The writer of I John would suggest that we start the process of really loving as God has called us to by first and foremost loving God. When we love God and obey God’s commandments, the writer says, then we will know that we are God’s children."  The sermon text is I John 5:1-6 with adjunct texts being Psalm 98 and Acts 10: 44-48, and the message is titled, "When We Love God."

I look forward to seeing you in the Upper Room this week at 9am. The worship service begins at 10:15am. http://www.ridgeviewmennonite.net/ 

My prayer for today:

Lord God, today we rest in your peace and love even when we are exhausted from finals, nighttime feedings, difficult coworkers, illness, and tough job stuff.  Today, Lord, we cling to you for comfort and safety for though the mountains tremble and the oceans roar, your love for us in unending even as we are deemed unlovable by people. Remind us that we are a family, united as your children, and that your neighborhood knows no borders. Instill in us a desire to offer hospitality and kindness to strangers and share extravagantly with those in need. I pray that each of us reading this, Jesus, will experience you in new, refreshing ways today. Come Kingdom of God; be done will of God, here on earth as it is in heaven.   In Jesus name. AMEN.  

Without question or doubt, you are loved by God, and I love you too! You can always contact me if you need to talk.

Love and Light,
carol "Always remember who you are, whose you are, where you are going, and what you believe, because it does make a difference!  Oh, and don't forget to attend a church of your choice this weekend. "  jd

“If any want to become my followers, let them deny themselves and take up their cross and follow me.For those who want to save their life will lose it, and those who lose their life for my sake will find it."

Children's Hospital National Medical Center, Washington DC  
  (Hospital stories 2 weeks in a row....)

0730 couldn't come soon enough.  I had worked a double shift as a "child care technician," a position created for nursing students in a baccalaureate program, and I was exhausted.  It was now 0720, that's 7:20am for those of you who don't follow 24 hour clock time; I'd recorded my report for the next shift and was counting the minutes to head down to the bus stop. 

"Maybe I should check my kiddos one more time before I leave," I muttered to myself.  Some of my little ones were awake and playing and some still sleeping. 18 month old James was the last of my little patients to check.  I peaked into his room, and there he was standing in his crib, smiling broadly, and covered with blood from his IV which he had apparently ripped out, and coated in what must have been incredibly explosive diarrhea. Seriously, how could such a little guy have excrement covering every inch of himself and the crib and the floor???? and he was so happy....  SIGH.   I  could sneak out of his room and no one would know I saw this spectacle; James couldn't tell anyone. I really, really needed to sleep. Surely no one would blame me if they knew what kind of night I'd had and how pooped (bad pun intended) I was.  Choices to make; character in question. I took a deep breath of hallway air and entered the room.  "Oh, James!" 


This week's message is entitled "Wax On, Wax Off," and Brother Mick will be sharing from the passage in Matthew 16:21-28 where Peter wants to prevent Jesus from facing death, and like we often try to do, keep Jesus clean and pure where all is happy and sweet rather than understanding Jesus is going to step into the muck where most of us are wallowing. Jesus certainly had loving arms around a sweet albeit stinky little boy named James, and Jesus invites us to join him  in entering the stuff of life.


As I was sitting in my office this week and the walls began to tremble and my desk to vibrate, once I realized I was not having some sort of "spell," the verse came to mind from Isaiah 54:10 "Though the mountains be shaken and the hills be removed, yet my unfailing love for you will not be shaken nor my covenant of peace be removed," says the LORD, who has compassion on you"  Now many are facing the effects of Hurricane Irene; let's remember God is our refuge and strength even as we fill buckets to flush toilets and boil potatoes to eat.


A fellowship meal follows the service on Sunday allowing us to spend some time in appreciation for Jeff and Cindy, as Jeff concludes his time as minister of music at Ridgeview.   God continues to use his servant Jeff in creative and amazing ways with his acting and musical gifts.  I am very hopeful that Jeff's words to us might be, "You've not seen the last of me!"  For those of you who enjoy piano music check out Jeff's website for his "In The Midst"  cd as well as his engagements.  I'm not sure if he has the cd available in digital format or not, but get a cup of tea, close your eyes, and be blessed as joy and peace flow from the dulcet sounds of the piano. We love you, Jeffrey!  http://jeffraught.com/

Monday  7pm at Ridgeview there is an affordable housing meeting with Robert Thomas, president of Tabor Community Services, to continue the discussion about housing issues in our area.  All are welcome to attend.


Some of you are teachers and back at school or going soon.  May you be filled with Spirit fruit; love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control, as you touch young hearts and minds.


College students, I am praying for you as you transition with roommates, classes, sports, food, professors, environment, schedules.....

My prayer for you today:  

God of Hope, in a world that is ever changing and at times hurtful, you are present and enter the muck with us providing healing and hope.  You've revealed your true love for us through Jesus, claiming us as your children! Fill each reader with an awareness of your love; be it on a cognitive level or an emotional one; be it through a coworker today or a roommate; be it in the reading of this prayer or the perusal of the newspaper.  You are omnificent and omnipotent, Creator and Almighty, yet made yourself a servant of love and have shown us a new way and a new hope.  Come Kingdom of God.  Be done, will of God.  Here on earth, as it is in heaven.  AMEN

Without question or doubt, you are loved by God, and I love you too.  Never hesitate to contact me!

love and light,

carol

"Always remember who you are, whose you are, where you are going, and what you believe, because it does make a difference!  Oh, and don't forget to attend a church of your choice this weekend. "  jd